There are instances in ones life which are strange, inexplicable and bordering on the supernatural. Such experiences do not lend themselves to the logic of questions and answers nor to deductive reasoning. I go back to the time when I had just lost my mother. I was an emotional wreck. It was my first brush with this kind of parting. The loss of a dear one is always deeply felt and leaves one hurting and sore. The realization that she was gone and the finality of her permanent absence from my life was something which was like a manic fever. Where is she? What now? Why me? Some streak in me kept hoping that I would somehow catch a glimpse of her somewhere. I flew to answer the doorbell, made a dash to take a telephone call all the time quelling that insane wish that it could be her. I knew I was living on edge.

Then one night while I tossed and turned, my thoughts in turmoil, I was overcome by a strange awareness. I whispered to myself ..she is standing by the bed and I am lying with my back to her..thats not right. Fear mixed with some sort of compulsion gripped me. I turned slowly, heart pounding, eyes peering into the dark. I saw nothing, no one. Then,suddenly, a sort of calm descended over me. I gathered whatever wits I had at the time,and ,wordlessly ,pleadedMother..is it you ? and if it is you can just once, just this once let me know that you are around? That you came when I called out to you? The ticking of seconds hammered in my ears. Time stood still for what seemed centuries. Then, all of a sudden, as if in reply , the calendar on the facing wall suddenly fluttered and was quiet. I hugged myself and shut my eyes tight, treasuring that single moment in time and I guess,must have fallen asleep.

I credit myself with a degree of rationality but no amount of self analysis succeeded in explaining that this incident was the imagination of a distraught mind. It happened eighteen years ago, but it is as vivid today as it was then.